just remember, someone outthere, wants you in their life.

Posts tagged “drama


? doubts and questions?

We started off as strangers
then soon became friends
I told you I loved you.
though you didn’t feel the same
soon after I said it, it started as a game
but soon became the truth
but I don’t know what made me love you

you’re the first one I think of when I wake up
and last one I think of before I go to sleep
I love you so much I wish you never have to leave

EVERYTHING, our late night talks, dumb jokes
awkward moments and all the laughter
just makes me fall in love with you more….
you give me butterflies when you say the sweetest things.
but when you act like the one I didn’t fall in love with…
it makes me wonder if we were really meant to be



Trey; pros and cons


  1. He is so cute!!
  2. He is blonde
  3. His. Eyes. Are. Fucking. Gorgeous.
  4. He isn’t overweight
  5. He is funny
  6. He is nice to me
  7. He isn’t Dillon.
  8. He likes to laugh
  9. He is creative
  10. He is smart
  11. He is tall
  12. He is fun to be with
  13. He made me forget Dillon
  14. He makes me laugh
  15. He is my friend
  16. He talks to me, FACE TO FACE
  17. He doesn’t hold a grudge
  18. He knows how to forgive
  19. He smells good
  20. HIS DIMPLES!@#$ %^&*() _=+-
  21. He shows interest in me
  22. He is nice to everyone.

Notice that this list is longer than Dillon’s ever was.

(This took me one minute and forty two seconds.)


  1. He is cocky
  2. He won’t tell me who he likes
  3. He is very to-himself
  4. We aren’t very close. We’re friends…but not really close.

Okay. I am sorry. That’s all I can think of. I have been sitting here for ten minutes. And I am stuck there. So does that tell you something?


Things I havent told you. (i have either been dishonest or lied by omission. I want to set stuff right.)

This list is far too long. There are several things I haven’t told you. There are several things I should have told you but didn’t. There are things I was ashamed of admitting to others, until recently. So spare me the judgments, for I have already judged myself. And I finally have the courage to admit it to the public, so that I wont be ashamed anymore.
here’s my list.

  1. I have had my first kiss. This was after I told you I never kissed anyone though. So I didn’t lie to you, I just didn’t tell you.
  2. My first kiss was Robert. That guy I saw for a week, when I thought I was over Dillon. He kissed me (and he wasn’t a very good kisser)
  3. later that week, I lost my virginity. Again, to Robert. I don’t want to hear how I was too young. I have heard. From everyone I told (not very many)
  4. it didn’t mean anything. at all. and that was the biggest mistake of my life.
  5. I am having feelings (strong feelings) for trey, but I am not completely over Dillon.


okay, maybe it wasn’t a super-long list. but the lists contents, make up for several unfilled pages.

I am sorry for not being fully honest with you. I regret.


loooonnnnnnnggg night…

lots of drama has been happening in my family the past few days. but one thing made it better. I got on Facebook for, like, 2 minutes, while my dad was away. (I was teaching him how to use the computer). he answered his phone and went in his room, so I quick logged into Facebook. remember that message I sent to Dillon that I quickly regretted? well, I finally saw his response.

*** my message

his response(s) ***


do you mean you think I like you or you like me? 🙂
well, I don’t know how you interpret that, but that smiley face just made my week. I replyed:

well, I kinda like you… sorry to embarrass you…

I haven’t seen his response yet.

in other news… I had a robot baby I had to do for a home EC project. that woke me up 11 times last night, so I only got 2 hours of sleep… so yea, I am pretty tired.